So I guess I haven’t posted anything since 2012. Does that make me the worst blogger ever? Probably not, but still, yeesh.
I’ll be honest, I completely forgot about this blog for a period of about two years. Probably more. I had a lot of shit going on (kids, you’re not allowed to say that word unless you’re only hanging out with your friends, got it?) during that time (including graduating college, falling in love, falling out of love, being unemployed for depressing periods of time, and then being gainfully employed for the longest period of time in my life), I can’t honestly say that things have calmed down, or that I’ll start paying more attention to this blog (I’m a flake, in case you couldn’t tell), but I’m writing this, and throwing general Creative Writing doctrine regarding the use of parentheses to the wind, so that’s a step in a direction.
By the way, in case you didn’t notice, this post will be somewhat Stream of Consciousness (spelled consciousness right on the first try!), I won’t even guarantee that I’ll proofread this before I submit it. Okay, I will, I’m not an animal. Spelling and grammar are the pillars that hold our civilization aloft (parentheses are the weird curvy walls), without them we would be alone in the dark.
The reason that I’m writing this has a lot to do with Quiet Desperation. I’ve been employed since April last year, although I’ve changed employers twice in that time (which I recognize is a blessing these days, and I am grateful), but the more work I’ve been able to get, the less happy I’ve felt. My first job was amazing, but I wanted more. My second job paid better, but sucked my soul out through my feet (concrete floors, don’t ask). Now I’m on my third job, which I’ve been working longer that any other job I’ve ever had. It’s engaging, pays well, and offers amazing opportunities for advancement, but can also be emotionally and physically exhausting. I think a large part of this post is the desire to do something that in no way relates to my current occupation.
This is the dam breaking, and it feels good.
So yeah, here I am. I won’t go so far as to say that I’m back to stay, but I am still here, and now anyone who reads this will know that as well. I’m not the same person that started this blog back in… 2011? Seriously? That’s… four years. This is my fifth post in four… okay. Focusing back…
I’m still here. I’m still alive. I’m writing this for others to read, and so that I can do something I like doing. I hope you’ll indulge me.